Tender Loving Care

This Christmas, 2012, i have two weeks of holidays, yet, i chose not to go home. ok, actually i wanted to go home but daddy and mommy and me, of course, reasoned out that the flight tickets just doesn't worth it. Daddy came up with better idea, instead of buying me the tickets, why not get me a new ipad or any tablets i want? Since i lost my samsung tablet. hmmph... Hence, i spend my Christmas here and i really enjoyed it as well.   I want to write this down so that when i'm old and look back at all this, i will really appreciate everything and everyone around me.  On Christmas eve, i went to kak Cory's house with kak Endah to help out (hahaha! so called help out with cooking), but ended up playing with baby Ray (Raymond) all the time. Food, of course. I ate a lotttt!  At night, Pak Jimmy invited few of us over to his house for dinner, and there i went. =)  Spending time with family is the most precious thing one can do. Thanks for the warmth of Chri...

我怎么了？ 陈丽甄啊，陈丽甄，你怎么了? 听得见里面你的声音吗？ 是累了？还是过于紧张呢？ 有时候对某一些事情别太执着，哭痛的只是自己。 专心吧！考试来了哟。。。

Work. Sounds a bit too formal. Maybe studies cum clinical rotation would explain better. Interest. Things that I find pleasure in doing. Looking at myself right now, have i lost certain interest in doing something constructive in my free time? Or am i spending it too much on all the dramas i watched? Hahahaha! Work. Studies. Exams requirements. + Interest. Fun. Relaxing. Hobby. ---> can they happen together? my answer: Yes! They do! Hence, i found a new interest and i promise to cut my dramas. Deng deng deng deng! My new challenge: PHONATIONS! Maybe some (or perhaps all) would wonder why i choose this. Simple reason: i wanna be able to learn new words and language and be able to pronounce them clearly! =) Now, I've found a new, constructive & meaningful (according to me) challenge to go with my 'work'. How about you? phonations ;) ps: Everyone is different, so, judge not and talk no nonsense about others. Place your attention on you, ...

音乐在很多时刻是我最好的伴。 不管在什么时候、什么地方、什么状况，只要插上耳机， 按播放，一切都平静了下来。 虽然我没，也不懂如何追求最新的，而且还是经常过时outdated， 但只要是好音乐，新的旧的，一切都是我的伴。。。 =） 一起加油吧！ ~啦啦啦啦啦啦~

There's always ups and downs in life, no matter which part of life we're in now, be it young or old. I'm angry because I did not express myself nicely and had been quite rough in my talking. I'm sad because I really do not want myself to be associated with people who talk nonsense all the time. I'm avoiding because I think that's the best way out. Just as I decided to say sorry, I lost my temper... My anger, sadness, avoidance all mixed up! Obviously, my anger surpassed any of them. Sigh... LOSER. The word I chose. Forgiveness is not easy. It's really hard. Easier said that done. But, one example has been shown to us: Jesus. I truly believe that God will not let His children be tested beyond their ability, because the Bible says so. "So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall! No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to us all. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond wha...

I was having conversation with my dear friend and this came up. "Everyone I met surely post this question to me, just because I'm a medical student and doctor-to-be. 'How's your study? When are you going to be a doctor?' Oh my gosh! How many times do I have to answer this question over and over again with a consistent yet satisfying one?" Out of a sudden I have this superb idea in my mind! This is how I see my Medical life... When I was a medical student, I'm a pure, white, blank paper (surely have to be SIRIM (quality-control) approved ones...), waiting to be painted and written on.  And now, a co-as (co-assistant) in clinical rotation, I'm a paper scribbled with loads of information, but there're lots of fill-in-the-blank to do.  In the future, as a houseman, I'll be a passage filled waiting to be corrected.  Move on, as a medical doctor, I'll be a re-written passage waiting to be tested.  Just as life moves on, I'll b...

Just a quick review from my experience in Interna in July... While i was on duty in the ICCU ward during interna, there was this patient with tubes all over him and needed CPR twice in the afternoon to keep him alive till night, when he passed away around 11pm. When i saw the patient, he kept going into cardiac arrhythmia, since he got cardiac arrest hours before, and ECG showed posterior-inferior infect, it would mean that he needs a PCT immediately. Hence, i asked the doctor why the patient was still here in the ICCU ward but not in the Cath Lab for the operation. The answer was a bit distressing: he has no money. The doctor explained that the procedure would cost a lot, and it is covered by the certain insurance for the poor, but not by some other insurance. If he is rich, then carrying the procedure will have no problem.If he is very poor or near poor, and have that certain insurance, there will not be a problem as well. The problem here is that neither him nor his f...

The sharing by Pastor Junn from Phillipines on Sunday in church is quite interesting. Hence, i would love to share one part of the sharing here. It's about the story of 4 Asians living in the state. There was a new barber shop which gave free haircut to their customers as their opening gifts. Then came these 4 Asians, Chinese, Indonesian, Japanese, and Phillipino. All of them had their haircut and were very happy and grateful for it. Hence, the next day, they planned to show their gratitude by bringing something for the barber. First, the Chinese brought dimsum, follwed by the Indonesian with sate ayam, and the Japanese, sushi. Later, the Phillipino came to the shop and he brought even more Philipino or friends! You can laugh all you want and say, "True, that's just how life is at times, share the gift!" wahahahaha! Now, come to the main point, and i quote: "Things that we received for free, had experienced, we want to share it with others." In fa...

3 months in my clinical rotation and I already felt and learned a lot of lessons from it. Frankly, the one thing I hate most about this life is gossip. I really hate it. Second thing that I can’t stand at all is the double faces of people I see and met every now and then. But please get it right, I’m talking about colleagues, spare the patients. These two things get me to evaluate myself in the very first place. Am I gossiping around? Am I the double faced person around others? I tried and am trying to further myself from all these. I’m trying to learn more from my patients and books. I’m trying to not be influenced by what others do and do what is best for me. Hmmph,  sounds selfish. Ok, maybe what I think and feel is best for all. I’m trying not to hurt people with my words. To help instead. To love despise the differences. Life is a lesson and I’m learning… =)

hmmph。。。深夜独自一人坐在宿舍的读书室，对着电脑和一本空白的笔记簿，突然觉得其实这感觉好奇妙。就在这时刻，我可以独自的想及做一些我想要做的东西。听歌、打字、发呆、在那空白的笔记簿上画画。 这感觉其实真的不错。=） 有时候真的感到非常的累。指的不只是 学业 工作的累，也指着人与人之间的互动。 无论如何，我会尽我的权力做到最好。 不惰、不愁、不烦、不怒、不赶，而是要去享受这一切一切。 ps：对不起，如果我错了，请原谅我吧！一起加油吧！

Today, 16th May 2012, marks the 26th Wedding Anniversary of my daddy Jeremiah Tan and Mummy Bee Luan. 26 years ago, they both took the vow and started a life together. 2 years later, they gave birth to a baby girl named Eunice (Yes!!! It's me!). 3 baby girls followed in nine years time. Wow! Four girls! Haha! All i have to say to both my mom and dad is "I LOVE YOU". I really do. "Because of your love for each other you both took the vow on this day 26 years ago. Because of of your love you both take care and support each other in ways that only both of you could understand, through hardships and joyful moments. Because of your love you both keep the vow tight and continue to walk in faith with God. Because of your love for us you both work hard to raise four of us in such marvelous ways. Because of you both we are who we are today. Thank you so much for showing us what love is all about... Happy 26th Wedding Anniversary daddy Jeremiah Tan and mummy Tan Bee Luan...

When i was in the emergency department the other day, a child came in with ambulance having seizure. The nurse and doctor rushed over and gave the child i.v. diazepam and oxygen. The nurse was furious as the child had been seizing for more than 15 minutes without any intervention but only infusion from the primary healthcare. When the doctor asked the mom about the child age, education and medical history, i was saddened. He is almost 9 years old without any education yet (which mean he cant read or write), and according to the mom she is going to enroll him soon into SLB (sekolah luar biasa). The child had seizure since 5 months old and from then on, he was diagnosed with epilepsy. Having status epilepticus last evening wasn't good for him. Looking at him, i felt my heart ached. It almost bleeds. But this scenario is only a tip of an iceberg. The question i have for myself: what can i do to help them? and i'm not talking about medically only, but also socially. Comparing...

Now one month had passed, and i officially finish my very first department out of twelve departments -- Dermatovenereology! At first i was scared, worries, and wondered how things would end. Now that i had gone through the very first challenge, i'm glad and proud to say that i'm grateful for everything that happen. Eheemmm (just clearing my throat, hehe), i would love to thank my group mates for being there for me. Thanks to Ressy, our chief, who always help us and put up with all our questions and tantrums... lol... Thanks to Rama, who drove me to the hospitals out of Jogja for two weeks and being hyperactive, robbing my title... lol... Thanks to William who pick me up to campus all the time... Thanks to Wenmei who always pick me up as well... Thanks to Ratih for picking me up as well... (alright, that's because i don't have transport and my group mates are nice  great enough to offer me rides... and i'm really touched) Thanks to PeCe, PamPam, Silvi, Bayu...

Last Monday painted one great memory in my brain. It was the start of my third week of koas (clinical rotation) in DV department and also the first day in RSUD Wonosari. Upon arrival, i suddenly remembered my friend, Ella, text asking help to transfer the KOH and KOH parker they brought there last Saturday. Trying to be helpful, i asked Bu Siti about the ink and went to the sink in physiotherapy room to do so with Rama. The transfer of KOH went well. Then when we open the KOH Parker, the tip of the bottle looks like it was meant to be used as it is, not needing any transfer. But since the bottle is plastic, while the other bottle is brown glass bottle, we thought it might be better to tranfer then. At first the KOH parker ink was flowing out slowly, then stop. But with slight squeezing it was flowing bit by bit. Both of us was just standing by the sink, talking, while rama transfering and i was cleaning. The next second, it was a loud "puff"! The KOH parker kind of ...

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength.  Love your neighbours as yourself. Love. It's simple. It's pure. :-) Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4

There we go. In a blink of eye, i've gone through my first week of clinical rotation in dermatovenerealogy department. I was in doubt with myself, especially my abilites. I was scared that i might not know how to communicate well with my group mates. I was anxious (no depression tough, hehe!) But, i know i can do this. I know that He is looking over me. He is with me. He is in me. No matter how hard this is gonna be for the next two years, i would love to learn more and grow tgether with my group mates. As the saying goes, learning is a life-long process. Be it my study or my relationship with others. All the best! =) Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4

Hmmph. Sitting in the lcct waiting to board my flight is boring! I have notihing to do and have no idea what to do either. Hence, i decided to try blogging using my blogger-droid apps. Here i am! Sitting, looking at people around you walking, running, talking, shouting (ok, perhaps not many), sleeping, family saying byes, kids holding on to their mom, kids with teddy bear in hand, kids happily following parents from behind, elderly with their walking sticks, teens and children with ipad in hand (you know what they do!), some with laptops, some reading book, some eating, not to forget, those working here, from the flight ground attendace to those working in shops and also those immigration officers. There are more that i could not mention here. One thing i would like to ponder upon. The earth rotates though you can't sense it. The world is moving on every second though you can't feel it. Time passes though you can't seem to notice it. You and i get older day by...

I think this is the first time I blog about a drama i watched. Its been long since i followed a drama non-stop from beginning till end within that period it was aired. On Call 36 hours being the latest and the one i like most. I would love to share a few quotes which personally i feel are good and inspiring ones. Hope they might bring you the feeling and encouragement i got from them. =) (if you really need translation, please let me know and i'll try best to help =D ) “坦白说，我当初也不知道为什么要做医生，打算在大学玩几年，可是当了实习医生后，开始觉得做医生一点都不好玩。无论我们当医生的原因是什么，所有病人却只有一个期望，就是希望我们能治好他们，期望虽然简单，但要实践并不容易。” “我不是法官，谁有罪谁无罪不关我的事，谁的存活率高我就先救谁。” “不要用你个人的道德标准，去断定一个病人是否应该救，我们是医生，任何病人在我们手上，都应该一视同仁尽力去救。” “生死有命，如果那—天真的要来，就随它来吧。最重要是把握现在。” “就算有多少个期望落空，我们也可以拥有新的期望，直到生命的最后一刻。” “我们是医生，并非神仙，也不是超人，我们都是普通人，每个人都必须经过生老病死。” “无论期望带给你安慰，快乐，还是伤心，能够期望与被期望都是幸福的事，因为我们还生存着。” “在今後的日子，无论富贵贫穷、快乐悲伤、健康疾病，我都愿意一生一世爱你，守护你，终生不渝，你愿意吗？” “也许期望会带来痛苦，但正因为有期望，就算有多痛苦我们都可以熬过去，所以即使多么害怕失望，多么怕痛，也不可以失去期待。” “我最近终於明白了一个道理，原来健康的人不一定快乐，有病的人也不一定不快乐。虽然我有这个病，可是这段期间我所得...

When i got text and tweet from my friends from my friends saying that i passed my OSCE Compre i was overwhelmed!!! Like what HY posted in her blogs, the was stages of confusion after getting the results. (you can read her post by clicking here --> HY-I passed! ) i was like her i guess. i needed to see the results with my own eyes. i need to check it. i need confirmation. i need re-confirmation. i went on fb. T hen only i believe! i was glad and was almost dancing around! The next day when i woke up, i was still thinking bout it. Was it real? Or just a dream? i was really happy! My endorphin level was high! i was and am still happy! In my heart, i was relieved and kept saying: finally! yes! i did it! God answered my prayer! Before my OSCE i was busy with my thesis and exams. I was scared that i have not enough time to study and remember what i needed. I prayed. I asked Him for guidance and mercies. I was wondering when will He answer my prayer? Now (passing my OSCE and going into fi...

Huh, there i go... i finished my theory year on 14th Feb 2012! What comes next is resultssss.... scare scare a bit... anyway, after my exam, i left for a conference in jakarta on 16th to 18th, and atteded a senior wedding on the 18th night in KL. Finally, i'm home! Happy! Back to my point, just wanna wish all my friends all the best in everything you do! No matter how we did for our OSCE Compre, we managed to finish our theory years! The new challenge is waiting ahead. Clinical rotations will not entangle us but will be the steeping stone in our journey. I'll not be afraid but to talk a bold step in life. Love you all!

Finally! Thank God! I finish my skripsi (or graduating paper) exam!!! And guess what? I got an A! Hehe! (everyone also get A basically, lol...) I've spend a lot of time, and also money on this particular graduating paper. Just for your info, the title is : "The Pattern of Antibiotics Resistance of Bacterial Corneal Ulcers in Two hospital in Yogyakarta." And my sample size is only 11 patients (sound pathetic, but it consumes a lot of analysis though simple...) Followed it long time ago, but left it untouched for a long time as well. Hence, when i continue, i found it time consuming and worse, little time is left! But, still, I managed to do it! Everything is done and finished! YEAH!!! Here, I would like to specially thank my doctors who guide and help me throughout this study. Dr Jarir, Prof Suhardjo, and Dr Hartono, thank you so much! =) i would always remember you all with your different characters! hehe! Not to forget, to my friends, especially to Hema, Aminda, Lailai, ...

Was worried, but had the peace in me. Was blurred, but had the guidance. Was scared, but had the courage. We can be worrying, scare, and plan a lot of things in our lives, and when timing is not right, we can't make a firm decision. Above all these, there is someone greater who always oversees everything in our lives. He is God, Jesus Christ. He plans. He guides. He is peace. He is joy. Whenever i (or you) feel worry about something, don't worry! Because He is never late! ps: I'm going home soon! and exams will be tests for me to grow and test myself, not some scary hindrance blocks! =)

Now, a new year has begin. You can hear people asking, perhaps not all, about your new year resolutions. So, what is my new year resolution? I wonder... I think at this point the thing that i concern the most is my studies. Not more than that. O, not forget, my family here in Jogja, which i really love and hold on dearly: Daniel Cell Group. Let's start with my studies. Currently last semester before koas (co-assistant)/ clinical years, i have to settle my results, finish my thesis, and go through OSCE Compre. with only 1 month left, i pray and SHOULD work hard to go through all these. Thanks to friends around, thanks to doctors, and most important, my family, who are always there for me. I know i can do it because of you all. I know He is with me all the time. As for cg, i am confused. though i know that everyone has different opinions and point of views, i just can't help to assert mine and keep holding to what i think is the best. As one of the cell group leader, i felt it...